I was excited to jump into Hercules in New York because Arnold Schwarzenegger’s movies have always been my favorite. 

As a child, I remember watching Terminator 2 over and over again on a VHS recording of the movie from HBO. My mom had asked my best friend’s mom to “tape” it for me since we didn’t have HBO — My dad remembers me watching it when he left for work and when he returned home. This went on the entire summer.

My Uncle loved Arnold; we would get together a few times a year to have Uncle/Nephew day’s in which we would play Stratego, Atari, eat pizza and watch Schwarzenegger films.

Commando
Kindergarten Cop
Predator
The Running Man
Total Recall

These were some of my favorites back then.

Now, it’s been years since I’ve seen most of these, so I thought it would be fun to review and rank Arnie’s movies. As I watch the films, I’m going to review each movie separately, here on Current Kick. and will be creating videos about all of them on my YouTube Channel.

I’m a little embarrassed to say, that there are a few of these movies that I’ve never actually seen before. Our first review happens to be on this list of shame.

Hercules in New York is one such film. I’ve only heard that it is awful; It does not disappoint.

Best part of the film.

There are 2 voice options for this film, depending on where or how you attempt to watch it.

  • The original release has Arnold’s voice DUBBED. The voice actor is terrible and doesn’t fit with Arnold at all.
  • Arnold’s acting is robotic (insert Terminator joke). He almost seems like he has no how to act on camera.

Quick Synopsis (the plot is paper thin):

Hercules is bored and wants to leave Olympus to explore the world. He leaves against his father, Zeus’ demands and literally flies down to Earth.

Herc meets up with a sidekick, Pretzie; a guy who sells…Pretzels.

The two of them somehow get involved with the mob. Hercules meets a girl, goes on a date and fights a bear, and eventually winds up competing in a weight lifting contest. I’m not joking.

Hercules & Pretzie getting ready for the weight lifting competition.

This is clearly a very early acting attempt by Arnold Schwarzenegger. Some of his films are campy and bad, but still, have that Arnold charm. Hercules in New York borders on almost being one of these films. It’s supposed to be a silly, fun time. There are a couple of scenes or lines I chucked at, but the bad outweighs the good, by a large margin.

The film as a whole contains bad acting, no plot, poor filmography (there are some abrupt scene transitions). The gods are not even consistent; some names used are Greek (as they should be), while some of the Roman names are used.

I rate on a 5-Star Scale:

1 – Awful – Stay Away
2 – Bad – Didn’t like it
3 – Okay – Mixed bag
4 – Great – Really enjoyed it
5 – Amazing – Must watch

Hercules in New York is an easy 1 out of 5.

Don’t bother, it’s a waste of time. I’ll never watch this movie again. I’ve already seen it more times than I would like during this whole process.

My next Arnold Schwarzenegger review will be Conan the Barbarian. I haven’t seen this film in probably 15 years, so I’m really pumped to watch it!

Arnold has been in a few other films between Hercules in New York and Conan, but they vary from cameos to a couple of co-starring roles. Check out Arnold’s Early Roles You Probably Never Saw.